Typically jealousy can be quite flattering
especially when it's from a partner, but the reality is that, after a while,
dealing with a jealous person can get quite difficult and frustrating. Learning
ways to deal with a jealous person can help you to eventually establish a
healthy relationship with the person. Jumia Travel, the leading online travel
agency, shares 6 ways to deal with a jealous person.
Try
To Understand the Reason for Their Jealousy
This largely involves trying to understand the
specific triggers, reasons or roots for feelings of jealousy in the person that
will help you effectively deal with the situation. Basically what you should
eventually understand is that the jealousy of a friend or partner isn’t
particularly motivated by who you are but by something you possess that they
either wish was theirs or they could keep all to themselves (i.e. unwilling to
share with any other).
Try
To Avoid Pampering Them
You should be understanding to the person quite
alright, but try to avoid responding to and validating the feelings of jealousy
your friend or partner has. This doesn’t mean you should ignore the person or
ignore the fact that they are jealous, but more like you should not let the
fact that they are jealous dictate and control your actions and reactions
towards them.
Avoid
Their Jealousy Triggers
In trying to understand the reason for their
jealousy, once you have been able to identify certain things you do or certain
situations that trigger or incite feelings of jealousy in a friend or partner,
as much as you can, try to avoid doing those things amidst them or being in
those kinds of situations with them.
Talk
to the Person
Talk to the person and be open about your feelings
(however, be careful with your words and don’t be insulting or caustic with
your words in the name of being truthful). Communicate to the person about
certain behaviours they exhibit when jealous that bothers you, how you feel
about them, how they affect you as an individual and how they affect your
relationship with the person. Sometimes a jealous person is unaware of their
irrational behaviours, so you have to gently and patiently communicate this.
Distinguish
Between Relationship Abuse and Jealousy
There is quite a thin line between these two so you
have to be careful and meticulous with this one. Be vigilant and sure that the
jealousy of this person has not escalated to some kind of emotional abuse to
you. Once physical abuse has begun that’s all the sign you need and will ever
need to leave immediately.
Try
to Address the Person’s Insecurities and Trust Issues
The only thing that can truly help a jealous person
get better is when he/she is able to effectively deal with their insecurities
or trust issues. This is because insecurities and trust issues are the
underlying causes of feelings of jealousy. For trust issues, the both of you
can try to take active roles in building trust in the relationship by simply
deciding to trust one another no matter what. Insecurities require a bit more
effort but once the triggers of the insecurities are identified, it’s possible
to effectively deal with and overcome the insecurities.
Damilola Ojo
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